There are so many ways in this world to communicate besides literal spoken language. One way of communication that's power I find is extremely underestimated is body language including facial expressions. Many people do not take into consideration how much they could understand and completely grasp if they only paid attention to what was right in front of them. Let's take a look at body language for a second. If you were talking to someone how would you be able to tell if they were enjoying conversation or not? You could tell if they were not enjoying it by noticing if they were looking at their watch over and over again, not making eye contact, not really responding, or if their body was facing an entirely different direction. These are just some examples that one could get a clue from. If someone were truly enjoying the talk they would engage conversation back, and offer advice or maybe ask questions to possibly keep the conversation moving. They would be in a comfortable relaxed position and they would be making eye contact every now and then just to reassure the speaker that they still have their attention.
I know that I use body language whenever I'm in the middle of a conversation. My hand gestures help me get my point across and I use everything that I listed above. Usually if I'm talking in a group of more than one person, the person that the anterior of my body is facing toward it the person that I am most interested in what they are talking about. Just today I was testing out the powers of body language and facial expressions in a supermarket. I had gone to pick up a thank you card for a family member that had filed my taxes for me and this middle aged woman happened to be in the card aisle as well. Right when I picked up my first card she immediately started talking and I mean talking ....NONSTOP. She was a very nice lady she just had a lot of issues in her family that she had wanted to vent to a total stranger about. She started by telling me that she had been look for a sympathy card and began the conversation by crying. I could tell she was under a lot of stress and everything so I humored her and gave her my support and attention. I figured it would be okay because I didn't have to be at work for an hour and a half. An hour later rolled around and she was still talking to me and by this time I had knows all her family member's names, every significant event that had happened in the past twenty years of her life, that her husband carried a man purse as she called it, and that her family had a hernia problem. By this time I had sneaked a peak at my cell phone (trying to avoid her seeing because I didn't want to be rude) and noticed I needed to get out of there. I tried to subtly give her the hints by shifting my weight around directing my gaze toward the door, pulling out my cell phone a few more times to look at the clock, then finally she understood and let me go, but not before asking for a hug. Body language does work, but had I had started to use more of it during the conversation I would have been able to make it to work sooner.
Another way of body language that everyone especially women tend to use is the way that they walk. Especially if they are alone females are always extremely vulnerable. In order to avoid the danger of getting abducted and to avoid the taunts and calls that every women gets, I try to walk with confidence. I keep my keys in my hand and my cell phone in an easy to reach place at all times. I don't make eye contact with anyone and walk with a purpose. There have been so many cases where women have found themselves in an undesirable position and this is my way of avoiding it. Body language has the power to even protect you!
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I really enjoyed reading your blog because I agreed with mostly everything you stated. I liked how your introductory paragraph started with how body language tells people if they are interested in the conversation. The details that you stated like if people “were looking at their watch over and over again, not making eye contact, not really responding, or if their body was facing an entirely different direction” made me question my actions. This made me wonder if I do the same thing when people are talking to me unintentionally. My favorite part of your blog was the second paragraph where you mentioned the personal experience you had with body language. I thought it really added to your statements and gave it more support about how body language is so effective. I find it really interesting that you were at the store for an hour while the elderly woman told you her life story. The fact that your last couple sentences in the second paragraph states how body language really works creates a sense of credibility on you as an author. You’re third paragraph was helpful to read because I never realized how women shouldn’t walk like they’re vulnerable when alone because it lures in the prey. Walking with confidence does make an impact on other individuals who are looking to cause harm. All in all, you blog was very enjoyable to read!
ReplyDeleteI thought your blog was very thought provoking. I think we all seem to forget that body language and facial expressions are a way of communicating. We tend not to notice whether people are really into the topic we are discussing or whether they would rather be at the dentist. You gave great distinctive things to look for when having a conversation with someone. Using your examples we can learn to judge if we should wrap up our conversation and move on or continue on and bring more into the conversation. I have also had complete strangers walk up to me in department stores and carry on conversations that they should keep private or at least to their therapist! LOL. I think it is that some people just find it easier to talk to a complete stranger than someone they know. If someone you do not know judges you then it is not as bad as someone you do. Plus the fact that you never have to see them again is a plus. I really liked how you used body language as a tool for women to protect themselves. I never thought of that! I have heard that carrying your keys in your hand is a great idea but never really thought that walking with a purpose could keep some of the creepy guys away. Great job!
ReplyDeleteAmanda,
ReplyDeleteThis is a very interesting topic you chose. Body language commonly used in our everyday life. I agree with your point of view in all aspect. Body language is a form of non-verbal communication; it comes in clusters of signals, eye movement, facial expression and postures, depending on the internal emotions and mental states. Statistically speaking, 93% of our communication is non-verbal. The ability to understand and use nonverbal communication is a powerful tool that will help you connect with others, express what you really mean, navigate challenging situations, and build better relationships at home and work. When we interact with others, we continuously give and receive countless wordless signals. All of our nonverbal behaviors, the gestures we make, the way we sit, how fast or how loud we talk, how close we stand, how much eye contact we make send strong messages. The way you listen, look, move, and react tell the other person whether or not you care and how well you’re listening. The nonverbal signals you send either produce a sense of interest, trust, and desire for connection or they generate disinterest, distrust, and confusion. Unfortunately, many people send confusing or negative nonverbal signals without even knowing it. When this happens, both connection and trust are lost in our relationships.